![]() ![]() There’s also the possibility that I totally misinterpreted the taste of these, but I’m not sure what else the mystery flavor could be. But I feel like if you’re going to trick people into buying 16 gag Pop-Tarts, you should at least make them more palatable, or perhaps pair these cheddar abominations with something more agreeable, like cheesecake. If they were trying to come up with something so ridiculous that it’ll make tabloid headlines and tie into their ~zany~ social media personality, then, well, they succeeded and will probably get the attention they crave. Ultimately, I’m not sure what Pop-Tarts was going for, here. Nor does toasting improve the flavor, instead making the smoky savoriness more obtrusive and even less sweet-balanced.įor the record, I tried one frozen, too, but the result was bland, extremely chewy, and borderline nauseating, so I don’t think I need to say much more on that front. Speaking of hot, the cheesiness of Mystery Flavor Pop-Tarts only becomes more obvious after you toast them-and your entire kitchen starts smelling like a bowling alley. Sure, for like one bite, it’s sort of a fun gimmick to taste the Pop-Tarts’ buttery biscuit crust melding with the sharp goo inside to create an overly aggressive Cheese Danish effect, but once you realize there’re still 1.5 Pop-Tarts left in your pouch-let alone your box-the novelty wears off quicker than a Lactaid pill, and you’re left with the unappetizing toaster pastry equivalent of a two day-old Little Caesars Hot-N-Ready. The question you may have next is, but are they any good? Nope! I even made some friends try a taste to make sure I wasn’t crazy, though I can’t be sure if they’ll still consider me a friend after such a fiendish mouse-bait-and-switch. Naturally, I did an octuple-take before very nervously biting in, hoping that maybe the truth was more innocent and a cracker-hoarding Kellogg’s factory rat died on the production line by these Pop-Tarts.īut nope: vaguely sweet toasted cheesiness is infused into the very core of Mister E. From my first nostril-wrinkling whiff upon opening the foil pouch, I detected familiar notes of oily, processed cheddar. I sincerely, honestly think these are Cheez-It Pop-Tarts. Pop-Tarts is? I’ll give you a couple line breaks for spoiler protection.Ĭheez-Its. No, what Pop-Tarts did was bold-exceptionally so, considering how you have to blindly commit to 16 Pop-Tarts when you buy these.Įnough clickbaiting: want to know what I think the mystery flavor of Mister E. However, Pop-Tarts also didn’t do what I hoped they would do: introduce a universally palatable, yet unique, flavor like Chocolate Hazelnut or Honey Pop-Tarts. See, Pop-Tarts didn’t do what Great Value Mystery Toaster Pastries did, by introducing a fruit punchy flavor so vague it could be anything from grape to grapefruit. Pop-Tarts I knew they had to jump the queue. Well, despite having a portly pantry’s worth of actual cereals awaiting review, after tasting Mister E. I know, I know: I just shared the news about these Mystery Flavor Pop-Tarts two days ago, and here I am already reviewing them. Well whoever he is, somebody better call him, because we’re gonna need a hearty “Oh, noooooo” to kick this review off. What’s the opposite of the Kool-Aid Man? A hollowed-out cherry full of molten glass? ![]()
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